Listen More Effectively

Lana J. Chandler
December 8, 2008 | COMMENTS

Many messages are being communicated during our current economic downturn, so listening and discerning what is behind messages is critical,” points out Teri Bosley, president of Monarch Performance Group, LLC (Auburn Hills, Michigan). “Furthermore, how you craft your message so that what you intend to convey is heard becomes even more important now. Think about what people are listening for—what will catch their attention and garner their interest?”

Listening is how we learn. Listening skills are a critical communication component of needs-based selling, rendering exceptional service, resolving complaints, and interacting with peers or team members. Listening is also a powerful tool for calming fears. In recent weeks, many financial institutions have been faced with...

• Clients coming into the branches asking if their money is safe.“ While it's tough to hear the redundancy of the client's message, it's a great opportunity,” Bosley says. “Each time a client asks this question, you have an opportunity to engage them in a benefit-oriented conversation and take a fresh look at their financial situation to determine additional ways to help.”
• Employees struggling with their own crises in regards to personal finances, worries about the security of their jobs, etc. “Great leaders understand that listening gives you a pulse by which to tailor your message to your team and determines what type of coaching and employee engagement is most critical,” Bosley continues. “Employees are usually clients of your institution, too. How well your institution educates and communicates ways to minimize impact and maximize confidence is critical. A key here is having frequent coaching conversations with employees where managers can listen and convey up-to-date information.”

Five Key Concepts

Effective listening is the ability to clearly understand the intended message of the communicator. The listener is able to accurately process the words, tone, and body language that the speaker is communicating and translate the message as intended.

“An important nuance with this definition is that often there is incongruence between a person's words and their tone/body language,” Bosley says. “Effective listeners work to reduce the ambiguity this presents by asking clarifying or probing questions and summarizing to fully understand the intent and the message.”

Sometimes people think they appear “smarter” because they talk a lot, whereas on most occasions talking less and listening more allows you to structure your message, so that you are more efficient and effective. To listen more effectively, Bosley recommends:

• Listen to learn. Focus on learning from every interaction. Many times people will listen for “just enough” information and then determine that they have “enough” to stop listening and either instruct, delegate, or explore a resolution. “Beware of the tendency to cut off the conversation too early,” cautions Bosley. Listen and probe deeper to learn more details. People often choose to tell their take on the situation first, leaving out major details.
• Become comfortable with silence. If your tendency is to move at a fast pace when conversing, then focus on slowing down enough to listen and process what is being conveyed. “There is ‘power in a pause'. By reacting too quickly, you can pass over critical information and details. Bosley says, “Take a few moments to digest what has been presented, even if you think you've heard the same thing before.”
• Listen with respect. Treat each conversation as an opportunity to value the other person. If you demonstrate a lack of respect, your ability to listen will be diminished. Respectful listening sets aside past concerns or personal differences to focus on the issue at hand. Be careful about creating a story in your mind regarding the individual that inhibits your ability to truly “hear” what they have to say. Avoid judgments about the messenger and listen to the message.
• Listen for the spirit of intent. Words alone may not fully convey a person's true message. Observe what the speaker says, how the speaker says it, congruency or lack thereof in body language, and sentiment behind the speaker's words.

Research reveals that 55% of communication comes from body language, 38% from the tone of voice and a mere 7% from the actual spoken words. Hence the saying “it's not what he/she said but how they said it.” What does your listener “hear” from your body language? Is it congruent with your words? Are you listening beyond words?

• Listen without ego. Set your ego aside and seek to fully understand another person's point of view. An inflated ego communicates arrogance which can cause a limited perspective. “When our ego gets in the way, we stop listening to others and focus on our own knowledge,” Bosley says. “Consider the value of combining your skills and intellect with those of another person as two heads are certainly better than one!”

Lana J. Chandler is the publisher of Branch Manager's Letter. Reprinted with permission.